A man walks into a confessional and says, \u201cForgive me, Father, for I have sinned.\u201d The priest asks, \u201cWould you like to confess?\u201d The man nods. \u201cI used the \u2018F-word\u2019 over the weekend.\u201d The priest sighs. \u201cSay three Hail Marys and watch your language.\u201d<\/p>\n
The man insists, \u201cLet me explain.\u201d He continues, \u201cI played golf on Sunday instead of going to church.\u201d The priest asks, \u201cAnd that\u2019s why you swore?\u201d The man shakes his head. \u201cNo, I duck-hooked my first shot into the trees.\u201d The priest nods. \u201cAh, that\u2019s when you swore.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cNo,\u201d the man says. \u201cI got lucky\u2014my ball bounced back, but before I could hit it, a squirrel grabbed it and ran up a tree.\u201d The priest asks, \u201cSo that\u2019s when you swore?\u201d \u201cNo, because then an eagle snatched the squirrel and flew away with my ball.\u201d<\/p>\n
The priest, now leaning in, asks, \u201cSo that\u2019s<\/em> when you swore?\u201d \u201cNo, because as the eagle flew over the green, the squirrel dropped my ball five inches from the hole.\u201d The priest gasps, then shouts, \u201cDon\u2019t tell me you missed the f**ing putt!\u201d<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" A man walks into a confessional and says, \u201cForgive me, Father, for I have sinned.\u201d The priest asks, \u201cWould you like to confess?\u201d The man nods. \u201cI… <\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":12844,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-12843","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-news"],"yoast_head":"\n